How many times did hit the snooze button this morning? No judgement, but seriously…
Also, I bet you could name, easily, 5 things you’ve been putting off doing. You know, those things you “have to get done” but never seem to find a way to make it happen. There’s always some convenient excuse for nothing doing what you “should” be doing. It doesn’t matter if it’s exercise, housework, laundry, or getting a head start on some project. You just don’t have to motivation to follow through! Does that make you lazy? Absolutely not! It makes you human.
There’s a difference between procrastination and flat out *not* doing something for no good reason. If you’re a chronic procrastinator, you might eventually check things off your list. Maybe you’re the type of person who works better under the stress. And there’s nothing more stressful than starting something at the last possible minute.
This, however, is not doing the thing. At all, for any reason whatsoever. Even though you know doing the thing would benefit you. Therein lies the subtlety. What you’re lacking is the motivation to get started doing something you don’t “have” to do, but something you “should do”.
Why can’t you get motivated to live a healthier lifestyle- say, exercise?
Can you relate? You know you want (or need) to exercise. Cardio, weights, stretching, whatever. Be honest here, you (already) know, when it comes time to actually doing the thing, you find a million different ways out of it.
“The kids, my job, no time, no equipment.” It all boils down to not feeling motivated to move your body. You’re not procrastinating until the last minute- squeezing in a quick cardio burst before starting dinner- you’re just not doing it. Follow these steps to help you shift your habits to be more motivated!
*Reminder, for the purposes here, the topic is exercise, but you can use these tips for anything.
Exercise is the easiest of the life habits to break. So to combat the lack of desire to do the thing, we start with the basics of goal setting:
Set a realistic goal for yourself. Key word here being REALISTIC. Pick an activity that’s realistic FOR YOU.
Don’t unintentionally set yourself up to fail by trying to do too much too fast, or trick yourself into doing something you don’t enjoy, just for the sake of doing it. This may lead to a feeling of failure and nothing will stop you dead in your tracks like feeling like you failed yourself. Try not to martyr yourself, it’s not worth it. If it’s not realistic for who you are at this moment, then be honest with yourself.
Yes, you already know that exercise is important for heart health and weight loss. The most important part of setting your goal is to take a good hard look at your beginning point, and be real with yourself about who you are, and where your level of motivation is. You don’t need to reinvent the wheel here. Your realistic goal would look like this:
“Every Wednesday at 4 pm I’m going to walk for 30 minutes.”
“Every (day of the week) at (time of day), I’m going to (some form of exercise) for (period of time).
Pick a day and time that you’re confident you can keep. Consider it a health appointment with yourself. And that’s it. Keep it simple, and doable. You’re the one who knows what you’re capable of, so set yourself up for success! Remember, slow and steady wins the race. Once you’ve shifted your goal into a habit, you’ll become motivated to go to the next level. That’s how you find success.
Reward yourself! You set a goal that was realistic, and you crushed it! There’s no stopping you! Now, you’re seeing results, and you’re motivated to do the thing. You’ve made the thing a habit, and changed your life for the better.
So give yourself an atta girl (or boy)! Once you’ve set your goal, decide on a reward, preferably one that has nothing to do with the goal itself. For example:
You’re doing some cardio. Great! Here’s how the reward portion of the motivation steps works.
“After I’ve done one month of consistent cardio I’m going to buy myself that purse I always wanted.”
“I’m going to detail my car”
“I’m going to paint my toenails.”
“I’m going to get a new puppy.”
“I’m going to take that trip to Paris.”
By making your reward totally different than the thing itself, you’re giving yourself an external motivator. Think about it this way- say, “once I’ve done my cardio, I’m going to eat a cheesecake”, you’re setting yourself up to dump the motivation you’ve just worked hard to get. Because, if you’re doing cardio for weight loss, then eating a cheesecake is not forward progress. But gifting yourself something is intrinsically motivating. Not only do you feel good, but you’ve got a tangible object to prove to yourself you did it. Make sense?
What you’ve done is given yourself a good old fashion dose of dopamine. And there’s no better motivator than what you can produce yourself.
Meditate on how you’re going to feel after doing the thing. We’ve already determined you need some motivation actually follow through. So, what’s it’s look like after you’ve done it?
Close your eyes and focus so intently on the image your mind creates for doing the thing, that you already feel like you’ve done it. How does your body feel? How does your soul feel? Concentrate on this as many times throughout the day as you need. If you need some proof, check out this guy. He’s got the goods to back up the theory.
One last thing to bear in mind…
You can follow any amount of advice, learn to follow steps til the cows come home, but if you don’t shift your thinking you’re not gonna go anywhere. Ultimately, it must come from you. You must be the main motivator, and your desire to change needs to be greater than more of the same.
