Why It’s OK To Put Yourself First

Learning to engage in some self care practices can be life saving. Combine almost 10 years of hard core divisive politics, mix it with a world-wide pandemic, and add a dash of overuse in social media. What you get is a whole lot of frazzled humans whose emotions are spent. It’s no wonder the amount of people experiencing depression and anxiety is on the rise. Exhaustion, depression, confusion. For as much as we’ve been subconsciously conditioned to this nonsense, taking the time to practice self-care can consciously “un-condition” you and get your wellbeing back on track.  

We All Need It. And We All Should Be Doing It.

Think of self care as learning to become your own support system. That doesn’t mean adapting to the idea that you have to do everything on your own. Instead, it means giving yourself some space and grace to release any negative emotions that are weighing you down and preventing you from feeling contentment. 

Pre-pandemic, you may have thought of self care as nothing more than massages, facials, manicure, pedicures and visiting the salon; self indulgent practices that only enhanced an instagram profile where every picture seems to say “wow, look how awesome and unrealistic my life is cuz I do these things!”.

In reality, self care is just that: caring for oneself. This can, but doesn’t have to be extravagant lifestyle choices that drive up your credit card balance (which leads to more stress) or buying a bunch of things that you know you’ll never use. Self care is the concept of taking time for yourself. Getting to know what gives you comfort in times of crisis or stress, and allowing yourself to engage in them, without feeling guilty or selfish.

There Are Many Different Ways To Practice Self Care.

Start by creating a small space, that’s not your bed, that is unique to you. Why not your bed? Because it can lead to excessive sleeping and a feeling of sluggishness. This space, however, can be in your bedroom; let it be anywhere that gives you a feeling of peace.

A Few Self Care Guidelines:

• Self care is intentional, not spontaneous. That doesn’t mean that you might not accidently discover something that brings you peace, it means that it’s something you’ve planned. You might say to yourself:  “Tomorrow I’m going to ___” or “I need to ___ to unwind.”
• It’s not harmful to you or others. Deciding to have a quiet glass of wine after a tough day is one thing, but drinking two bottles then getting behind the wheel of the car is absolutely not! Also, baking a pan of brownies and telling yourself you’ll have one or two bits every day can be a healthy indulgence, but eating the whole pan, plus ice cream in one sitting should probably be avoided (this may or may not be coming from experience). If your need for self care is because you haven’t been expressing yourself constructively then go make some art, play some music or even get up and dance around your house.

The point is, self care is subjective.

No One Can Decide What’s Best For You But You.

So don’t be fearful of asking yourself what you need and exploring what works in your heart. Because at the end of the day, that’s where it all comes from.

If you’re not sure where to start, click the link to get some great ideas.